🔗 Share this article Evening Comics Take Aim At Trump's Controversial 'Gold Card' Immigration Scheme TV's prominent entertainers spent their broadcast criticizing President Donald Trump's recently unveiled visa program, called the "Trump card," characterizing it as a obvious pay-to-play arrangement for the rich. The Late Show's Sarcastic Spin Opening his broadcast, Stephen Colbert offered a mock holiday jingle about the president. "He's making a list, checking it twice, before giving that list to the people at ICE," he intoned. "Donald Trump ... ruins all he handles." The focus was the controversial plan that enables international individuals to acquire U.S. legal status for an investment of $1 million dollars, or "platinum" tier for five million. A government portal promises approval "in record time." "A brief note here to rich immigrants: prior to you pony up, what about Canada?" Colbert joked. He explained that the scheme is also meant to "get cash" from companies wanting to hire foreign workers, with large payments. "That's a lot of fees, but if you register, you also get two free nights at a hotel of your choosing – provided that it's the that one hotel," he added. "The most thorough vetting the government has before done," remarked Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "that $15,000 vetting to verify these individuals truly qualify to be in America." "That's important, you have to prove you're fit to be an American," Colbert deadpanned. "First question: how many hamburgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?" Jimmy Kimmel's Blistering Commentary On his own program, Jimmy Kimmel dubbed the initiative the "Get Into America Express Card." "It's a card that will permit wealthy international individuals to live here," he explained. "For a million dollars, you get legal visitor status, you get a road to citizenship, and a president's pardon for one serious crime of your choosing." "Perhaps it's time to revise that inscription on the Statue of Liberty – to hell with your tired masses. Give us a million bucks, you're in!" he added. Kimmel teased the lack of detail of the application, observing it is "harder to start a Wordle account." He remarked that Trump "thinks citizenship is something you can sell, like a steak." "Exactly, the best people are the rich people," Kimmel said. "That's what Jesus always said! Read it in the Bible. He says it's easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle provided that you pay the needle a million dollars." Seth Meyers on Grocery Struggles On another network, Seth Meyers focused on Trump's plunging poll numbers during economic concerns. "People gave Donald Trump a second term because they were mad about the economy," he noted. This week, in a effort to address cost of living, Trump conducted a briefing in front of a display of food items, and behaved peculiarly to some cereal. "What a nice job, I think I'm going to take some of them with me to my home and have a lot of fun," Trump remarked. "Like the Cheerios, I haven't had Cheerios in a while." "Trump is so incredibly weird," Meyers responded. "Like, you're going to take them back to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What exactly happens with those Cheerios?" Meyers concluded by targeting right-leaning news coverage of Trump's economic performance. "Maybe rather than complaining, you should give him a shiny trophy similar to the one FIFA did," he laughed.
TV's prominent entertainers spent their broadcast criticizing President Donald Trump's recently unveiled visa program, called the "Trump card," characterizing it as a obvious pay-to-play arrangement for the rich. The Late Show's Sarcastic Spin Opening his broadcast, Stephen Colbert offered a mock holiday jingle about the president. "He's making a list, checking it twice, before giving that list to the people at ICE," he intoned. "Donald Trump ... ruins all he handles." The focus was the controversial plan that enables international individuals to acquire U.S. legal status for an investment of $1 million dollars, or "platinum" tier for five million. A government portal promises approval "in record time." "A brief note here to rich immigrants: prior to you pony up, what about Canada?" Colbert joked. He explained that the scheme is also meant to "get cash" from companies wanting to hire foreign workers, with large payments. "That's a lot of fees, but if you register, you also get two free nights at a hotel of your choosing – provided that it's the that one hotel," he added. "The most thorough vetting the government has before done," remarked Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "that $15,000 vetting to verify these individuals truly qualify to be in America." "That's important, you have to prove you're fit to be an American," Colbert deadpanned. "First question: how many hamburgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?" Jimmy Kimmel's Blistering Commentary On his own program, Jimmy Kimmel dubbed the initiative the "Get Into America Express Card." "It's a card that will permit wealthy international individuals to live here," he explained. "For a million dollars, you get legal visitor status, you get a road to citizenship, and a president's pardon for one serious crime of your choosing." "Perhaps it's time to revise that inscription on the Statue of Liberty – to hell with your tired masses. Give us a million bucks, you're in!" he added. Kimmel teased the lack of detail of the application, observing it is "harder to start a Wordle account." He remarked that Trump "thinks citizenship is something you can sell, like a steak." "Exactly, the best people are the rich people," Kimmel said. "That's what Jesus always said! Read it in the Bible. He says it's easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle provided that you pay the needle a million dollars." Seth Meyers on Grocery Struggles On another network, Seth Meyers focused on Trump's plunging poll numbers during economic concerns. "People gave Donald Trump a second term because they were mad about the economy," he noted. This week, in a effort to address cost of living, Trump conducted a briefing in front of a display of food items, and behaved peculiarly to some cereal. "What a nice job, I think I'm going to take some of them with me to my home and have a lot of fun," Trump remarked. "Like the Cheerios, I haven't had Cheerios in a while." "Trump is so incredibly weird," Meyers responded. "Like, you're going to take them back to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What exactly happens with those Cheerios?" Meyers concluded by targeting right-leaning news coverage of Trump's economic performance. "Maybe rather than complaining, you should give him a shiny trophy similar to the one FIFA did," he laughed.